Most women dream of understanding the male brain, at least at some point in their lives. It’s no secret that their minds work very differently than the female brain. Fortunately, there are some resources available to help you understand the way men think – and “His Secret Obsession” is one of them. It is essentially a guide to understanding men and using your knowledge of their minds to your own benefit.

Once you know how your man thinks, you can begin to develop a relationship you’re both satisfied with.

About The Author

The book is written by dating and relationship expert James Bauer. Throughout his 12-year career, he has helped many women to mend their relationship issues and understand how men think. He has also created a few other helpful relationship programs and books. “What Men Secretly Want” is another one of his books, and tackles similar topics. Bauer’s experiences as a relationship expert – and as a man himself – make him the perfect person to write a resource for women who want to understand men.

The Meaning Behind “His Secret Obsession”

If you’re wondering what the truth behind the book’s title is, the answer is simple. It’s an expression that means you can understand how men want to be treated, and use that understanding to gain your man’s devotion.

The book also focuses on the impact that communication can have on your relationship. A lack of communication can be harmful, as well as bad communication. Misunderstandings, arguments, and disagreements can all occur as the result of bad communication.

It’s well-known that men and women have very different ways of communicating, and the goal of “His Secret Obsession” is to figure out how you can better communicate with your guy. Because men and women rarely think alike, communication can be a challenge. Fortunately, there are so many ways to help this problem – and they’re all included in “His Secret Obsession”. Knowing what to say, how to say it, and how to use your body language can positively impact the dynamics of your relationship.

What is The Psychology Behind This Book?

It’s easy to assume that a difficult relationship cannot be mended, but the truth is that there are many things you could try. This book has plenty of ideas, as well as psychological information about the way men think.

Every man has the “Hero Instinct”, which is a biological instinct that can keeps him wanting to stay. If your guy believes that you need him as your hero, he’ll likely be hooked. Triggering his “Hero Instinct” is just one of several psychological tricks you can use to your advantage and fix your relationship.

You may be wondering why you’d want to manipulate your guy or use tricks to gain his affection, but the answer is simple: he thinks very very different than you.

Because a man’s mind is drastically different from a woman’s, you may need to adjust your words and actions to get him to behave the way you’d like. Although this may sound like a bad idea, it’s actually a simple way to improve your relationship. By understanding how he thinks and gaining his affection, you’re likely preventing future problems.

Techniques You’ll Discover

These are some of the tricks, signals, and strategies that are included in the book. They may sound simple, but they can be truly effective in building your relationship.

• Relationship Material:  This is a list of qualities that can help ensure your man will want to stay with you through thick and thin. When you take advantage of knowing what qualities men generally want in a serious partner, you can achieve security in your relationship.

• The Private Island:  This technique is great for helping your guy to develop serious feelings and emotions towards you. Becoming a “Private Island” for your man means that he’ll see you as an escape from the rest of the world – and he’ll never want to leave!

• The Ex-Back Signal:  This is ideal for girls who have gone through a difficult breakup and still desire their ex-boyfriend. The Ex-Back signal utilizes four phases that’ll get your ex begging for another chance.

• The Glimpse Phase:  This can help you to show your man your genuine self, achieve his attention, and keep him wanting more. If you’re worried that he doesn’t care to know more about you, this trick will help.

• The Damsel In Distress Signal:  This signal involves showing him that you need him, and bring out his protective instincts. As a result, you’ll probably receive a lot more affection and attention. And who wouldn’t want more attention?

• Silent Action Signal:  This involves tapping into your man’s “hero instincts”, which makes you instantly more attractive. Using your hidden abilities and triggering his instincts can do wonders for developing a better relationship. If you’re wondering how to trigger those instincts, this book will tell you exactly how.

• I Own You:  This signal makes you the one he’ll choose to open up to, and you’ll soon know his secrets. Although it may sound possessive, it’s all about making sure you’re the one he shares his thoughts with.

Is His Secret Obsession Right For You?

Facing relationship problems is unavoidable for any couple, and many women wonder what they can do about it. You may be skeptical of these ideas, but this book is intended to help women better understand the way a man thinks. Whether you use that understanding to heal a broken relationship, get ex back, or simply strengthen your bond with your man – that’s all up to you!

Relationship advice should never be limited only to those who are in a failing relationship. You may be thinking that none of this advice can help because your relationship is fine, but there’s always room for improvement!

Maybe you wish your man would ask more questions about your life, or you want him to talk more about his feelings for you. Regardless of what specific problem you’d like to fix, the advice that this book offers can likely help.

If your ultimate goal is to achieve a long-lasting, loving relationship, “His Secret Obsession” may be worth trying.

You may also want to give this book a chance if:

  • You feel as though your man could lose interest and leave at any point: No one wants to constantly worry about their partner leaving, and thinking that he’s losing interest will only make you feel worse. This can help ease your concerns and capture his heart.
  • You are dating a man who doesn’t seem to appreciate you: Every woman deserves to feel heard and appreciated in their relationship. But if that’s not how you’re feeling, you may want to try using tricks and signals to make your man see that you need more respect and affection.
  • Your guy isn’t ready to take your relationship further: Many men have commitment issues, and it’s a common dating problem that a lot of women deal with. If you’re stuck trying to get him to take your relationship to the next step, these ideas may be able to help. Showing him that you understand what he wants and needs is a great step towards getting him to commit to you.
  • Your partner doesn’t trust you or doesn’t open up to you: Nothing is more frustrating than a partner that won’t let you know how he’s really feeling. If you find yourself constantly wondering what he’s thinking or what’s going on with him, this book includes plenty of ideas to help.
  • You want to develop a deeper connection with your man: Even if your relationship is mostly great, you can still desire a stronger bond and connection with your guy. Many of the tricks you’ll learn from this book can help you form the bond you want.
  • You feel like your relationship is failing: If you feel overall that your relationship is not successful, you may want to give this book a chance. Understanding the way he thinks is the first step to fixing any of your relationship’s problems.
  • You don’t seem to have any control or voice in your relationship: Some women feel overshadowed in their relationships, which is never a good thing. Fortunately, using these tricks can help you to regain some control and feel confident in your relationship.
  • You feel as though your relationship is going nowhere: If you’re concerned that your relationship is failing, but you don’t want to end it, there’s still hope! Trying out these ideas and tricks can help you determine whether there is serious potential for you and your guy.
  • Your guy has other interests that seem to matter to him more than you: Every woman wants to feel like they’re number one in their man’s heart, and feeling less important than his other interests can hurt. But nothing will get your man’s attention back faster than the use of some simple psychological tricks!
  • You are recovering from a breakup and desperately want your ex back: Breakups can be devastating for anyone, and you may find yourself truly wanting your ex back. If that’s what you want to achieve, this book may have the skills you’ll need to steal his heart again.
  • You feel as though your relationship needs more strength: Whether your relationship is very strong or extremely weak, it can always benefit from some extra strength. Understanding your guy’s mind through this book can lead to a better, healthier relationship.

Pros and Cons

Every book or product has its benefits and negative aspects, but it’s up to you to decide whether it’s worth a chance.

Here are some of the pros and cons of “His Secret Obsession”:

The Pros

  • Full of information, written by a professional dating and relationship coach
  • Includes concepts you probably haven’t heard of before, such as the ‘hero instinct’
  • Offers a ton of different strategies for a variety of purposes

The Cons

  • There is no guarantee that it will work exactly as you’d like it to


Despite all of the crucial information included in “His Secret Obsession”, there is actually no guarantee that it will work as you’d like. Every man is different in some ways, which means that the results will likely differ. For example, if your guy has hidden issues that you’re unaware of, these ideas may be ineffective.

However, you can still gain useful knowledge from “His Secret Obsession” – whether the advice is successful or not. Every woman can benefit from an understanding of how men think, because their minds are incredibly different. That’s why it’s important to know the way they think – and that knowledge can help build better, stronger, relationships.